The Plumber’s Tale

I got a call to come out and look at a house. The guy on the phone said stuff was coming out of his pipes. I asked him what kind of stuff. He said you have to come here and see it. So I went. The house stood on a hill, stark against the sky. The guy opened the door before I even knocked on it and took me downstairs. His pipes were exposed against the walls and ceiling. Purple ooze seeped out of them. Oh, I said, that’s just inter-dimensional glop. Didn’t you know this house is haunted?

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