The Meteorologist’s Tale

They call me the weatherman. I’m the least reliable person you consult on a regular basis. Did you know meteorologists have the highest incidence of depression? Lots of people think it’s dentists. Nope. It’s weathermen. We drink a lot, too. There’s so much responsibility. The atmosphere weighs six quadrillion tons. That’s a lot of air to keep track of. It’s overwhelming. Sometimes I think it’ll all evaporate into space. That’s when I order another Sea Breeze. Vodka, cranberry juice, and grapefruit juice. Shake in a glass with ice until you get a foam on the top. Makes me forget everything.